Fathers Day

Reflections from Therapists: Dear dad on Fathers Day

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Reflections from Therapists: Dear dad on Fathers Day

Dear Dad,

The words that come to mind when I think of you today are “thank you”. Thank you for being the man that you are and encouraging me to be the woman I am today. Thank you for always taking the time to listen, to hear, and to teach me without ever telling me what to do. Thank you for allowing me to learn that experiencing my own life, growing from my own mistakes makes me the strong resilient woman I am today. Thank you for always cheering me on, for being enthusiastic (you told me one day I would learn to love it), and rarely wavering in the midst of a challenge. Thank you for teaching me how to love myself by watching you love my mom, and being a role model for my husband to love me and my children. Thank you for being a caring Poppa, always enthralled in your grandchildren’s tosy, movies, and mac’n’cheese. Thank you for showing me true strength and power is that of empathy and compassion for yourself and others.

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The Now

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The Now

“As I lead this army, make room for mistakes and depression” -Kendrick Lamar, “Mortal Man”

(For reference, I am a white female and go by the pronouns she/her)

As a student becoming a therapist, multiculturalism is a mandatory class in a graduate school program. The lectures and the classes emphasized that you and your experiences alone are not enough to empathize with those who not only look like you, but especially to those who don’t look like you. I loved the classes, and heeded the messages that the seasoned professors were imploring is to do…look inward, listen, learn and when you think you’ve learned enough-keep learning. I am now understanding I have not done enough. Continue reading →

Reflections from a therapist: Taking Your Child or Teen to Therapy

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Reflections from a therapist: Taking Your Child or Teen to Therapy

What you should do before the 1st session

1. DO NOT surprise them. Telling your child what to expect will decrease the anxiety they have about starting therapy. During the first session, you can tell your child to expect to be asked questions, so the therapist gets to know you. There are no wrong or right answers to these questions, therapy is not a test. It’s recommended to tell children about 1-2 days before the first session, and teens about 5-7 days before. Continue reading →

How to Help Your Child & Family Come to Terms with this New Reality

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Reflections from a Therapist: How to Help Your Child & Family Come to Terms with this New Reality

On May 4th it was announced that New Jersey schools will remain closed for the rest of the school year. For many, this is an unsettling time. Kids, adolescents, and teens are missing their peers, teachers, classrooms, sports teams, and clubs. Peer interaction and play are fundamental to their development, and it looks very different right now. Continue reading →

Reflections from a therapist: Mother’s Day In Quarantine

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Reflections from a therapist: Mother’s Day In Quarantine

Mother’s Day- a day to celebrate and honor mom. I have been having quite mixed emotions upon thinking about the day. Something that has been coming to the surface of my mind is how no matter what your lifestyle is like, whether you have children, single, spouse, etc. we are all currently taking care of ourselves the best we can, and you know who taught us that? Our parents-and most likely our mother, grandmother or some maternal figure. We are digging deep and utilizing the skills of how to survive, find strength, and carry on through the dark of night into the light of day. The basis or foundation of many mothers world wide. Continue reading →

Coping for Couples during COVID-19

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Reflections from a Therapist: Relationship Tips during Covid

Coping for Couples during COVID-19: 6 Tips to Keep your Relationship Healthy

The Covid-19 social isolation has had an impact on all of our daily lives. We are staying home and couples are spending more time together than before. While that can be great, it can also be challenging. Trying to balance working from home, childcare, household duties, and homeschooling can cause higher levels of stress and anxiety. This may lead couples to become overwhelmed and frustrated with each other. This is completely normal, especially during a crisis. So what can couples do to relieve some of the tension? Here are 6 tips to help from a psychotherapist: Continue reading →

Ramadan During Quarantine: Creating a Sacred Place at Home

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Ramadan During Quarantine: Creating a Sacred Place at Home

This year Ramadan, the Islamic month of fasting from sunrise to sunset, will be a different experience for all of us. We won’t be hosting family and friends over for iftar dinners. We won’t be going to the musjid at night to pray. We won’t have that physical sense of community, a time when we usually strengthen our bonds with family and friends.

Despite these difficult and isolating times, I still wanted this holy month to be meaningful. Once I knew Ramadan would be at home due to COVID, I started to plan a Ramadan spent at home with intention. I chose to focus on what we would need to have a meaningful month and really invest in our home space this year to really follow in the Islamic tradition of ease and simplicity.

One night around the dinner table, I had my kids and husband list their duas, or individual prayers. Together, we then created a family master dua list. This way, all of our duas are connected to God and each other. Some of our duas included prayers for the entire worlds healing of Covid and prayers for ours parents who are in Pakistan. Continue reading →

Reflections from a Therapist: On Slowing Down

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Reflections from a Therapist: On Slowing Down

It’s so easy to get lost in our own lives.

This last month in quarantine has taught me so many valuable lessons, especially in the art of slowing down. Thus far, I have been blessed with a fast paced life, filled with love and joy. As I slowly approach 40, most of my life until now has been rushed. I always felt as though I never had a moment to sit with my thoughts, to truly process it. Continue reading →

Reflections from a therapist : Parenting during a Pandemic

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Reflections from a therapist : Parenting during a Pandemic

Everyone seems to be saying the same thing since we have been in COVID-19 isolation: this homeschooling while working thing is impossible, infuriating, exhausting, overwhelming, annoying, anxiety provoking. And all that is true, I am learning, as I home school my 4th and 1st grader. I have become a master of flexibility, of letting go, of taking deep breaths and walking away. I have grown to appreciate my husband more in this past four weeks than I have over the past 12 years. I have scratched my head over new math and spent more time than I am interested in on first grade “fundations” (spoiler alert: there’s nothing fun about it). Continue reading →

5 Benefits of Getting Outdoors Even During Social Isolation

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5 Benefits of Getting Outdoors Even During Social Isolation

“Go play outside!”

You might have heard that from your parents. You might have thought they wanted you out of their hair, or to get away from the TV, but what if we told you they might have had a point? (Gasp, never!) It’s not too surprising though; before the onset of COVID-19, Americans spent more than 90% of their lives indoors. Considering the far reaching effects of coronavirus and social isolation, that percentage may be higher for some.

On the flipside, with many now working from home and children either out of school or participating in school online, many adults and children have rediscovered the outdoors and have used it to their advantage to combat the boredom that comes with social distancing. Continue reading →